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Ever wondered what the characters of TVD would sound like giving voicemails? Here’s your chance to find out!

Damon: Hello, you’ve reached Damon Salvatore. I am not available at the moment. I’m chasing my brother’s girl, at the grill drowning in my sorrows, or I’m fucking and abusing girls to get my mind off Elena. Please leave a message and I’ll kill- I mean call you later. *beep*

Stefan: Hello, you’ve reached 1-900-PUSSY-VAMPIRE. I’m not available at the moment. I’m too busy either brooding over the fact that my balls left me and I’m less of a man then my brother is or I’m...
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Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one
I still got the seed

You said move on
Where do I go
I guess second best
Is all I will know

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes

You're like an Indian summer
In the middle of winter
Like a hard candy
With a surprise center
How do I get better
Once I've had the best
You said there's
Tons of fish in the water
So the waters I will test

He kissed my lips
I taste your...
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Klaus walked over the street, dialing a number. He looked furious as he held his phone against his ear.
Rebekah’s phone buzzed and she rolled her eyes when she recognized her caller.
“Nik, what?" she asked annoyed.
“Funny, I was about to ask you the same question” Klaus replied. “I can’t find Tyler anywhere. Do you know where he is?”
“No, Klaus, I don’t know where your little bitch is” Rebekah replied. “Now, for once in your life, do as I say and stay inside. Lock the doors and the windows and watch American Horror Story or something”
“I’m afraid I can’t do that,...
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Tyler left his house and saw Veronica standing on the doorstep. He was surprised to see her, but acted it was pleasant.
“Hey, I didn’t expect to see you here” he said as he walked to her. He gave her a kiss on the lips and though she didn’t turn away, he could still feel her abstention. “Something wrong?” he asked suspicious.
Veronica didn’t answer.
“Walk with me?” she simply requested and she started walking, Tyler next to her. “I’ve been thinking” she started after a few minutes of quietly walking. “You’re a high school kid and I’m 23 years old and I know that’s...
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The next morning

Damon and Elena were lying asleep when someone rang the bell. Elena was fast asleep, so Damon sneaked out of bed and put on his pants from the day before.
“Hurry up, Damon. You don’t want her to bleed to death, do you?”
Damon groaned as he recognized Rebekah’s voice. He walked to the door and opened it and Katherine fell in his arms. She was bleeding from her neck and Damon looked up shocked at the blonde Original, who smirked at him.
“What happened to her?” Damon wanted to know.
“I happened” Elijah answered, stepping forward. “Can we come in?”
“No!” Damon said rude.
“I was merely being polite. Of course we can come in. This house is being hosted by vampires, whom cannot possible deny the admission to an Original. So, why don’t you step aside? We’ve got things to do, plans to make, wars to prepare” Elijah said as he walked past Damon.
The sun rays shone through the curtains and illuminated Elena’s face. She slowly opened her eyes and brought her hand to her head. She threw off the sheets and swung her legs over the edge off the bed.
She frowned and rubbed over her arms.
“Are you cold?” Damon asked, who had woken up as well. He couldn’t see Elena’s face and thus couldn’t know that it wasn’t the temperature in the room that was bothering her. She turned around and Damon flashed to her.
“You’re hurting” he realized worried.
Elena nodded. “Yeah, and I’ll be hurting a lot more since we’re training all...
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